Amazing...

Wow... I actually managed to spoil my piano. Here's what happened. The B below Middle C, the hammer returned only halfway, and so now i'm left with a soundless B unless i hit it hard enough. My tuner says (over the phone) that it has probably jumped out of position, and he's coming to fix it on monday. Ah new piano some more...

Anyways, i've an interesting tuner. When i first told him that the hammer didnt return, he said, "what did you do, use the hammer to hit someone?"

oh wells. is this a first sign of too overbearing on the piano, expecting so much from a quiet partner who doesnt complain, doesnt criticise, but only does what she is told to, sounding when i press the keys... Have i been too hard on her, that she has finally protested to the Khachaturian, prokofiev, and rachmaninov? Is it a sign of some kind, about my piano playing, and should i take note of how i play?

I'd rather believe not, and believe that the piano was not in a good condition when i bought it. Ha. always push the blame to others.

No that's not good. Sorry dear piano, next time i shall only play rachmaninov, khachaturian and prokofiev with half the strength.

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I've just been recommended for another accompaniment job, though i wonder how Mrs C managed to 'highly recommend' me, as someone who is a 'good accompanist, able to sightread very quickly'. Ha. wow. she actually notices. Hmmm... Then probably she would have noticed i like accompaniment better than solo-ing. Maybe i'll major in accompaniment next time. Dunno. long time away from now.

By the way, this job i got, haha its for a performance tomorrow night. What pieces? Carmen fantasy arranged for flute (last part only) and All I Ask Of You. lalalalalala.

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Have recorded sea fever. Here's it, if you can d/l it. http://www.geocities.com/seecheehang/Sea_Fever_Final.WAV
What was interesting though, people who could have come pulled out, and my song actually required 8 people because of one bar of 8-part split. But still, we had 5 and a half person singing. (the half was contributed by me, trying to sing lower bass two, making it sound nice and audible over the likes of Gabriel and ZZ, with a throat that refuses to open after one day of losing my voice.) It s an okay recording i suppose, guess will submit that. Though if i have another chance to record it before submission in Mid Oct, i guess i'll record again. I was listening back to the ones vocale sang, and i thought i liked the sound better.

Oh by the way, here's those who sang for me: zz, Luke, Gabriel, Shen Ting, Bjorn. Thanks a lot. for mugging it out in one hour plus and recording 4 times, staying till 7+ in school.

Oh gabriel was so amazed at RJ that he kept taking photos. haha. go read his blog.

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I'm totally like not functioning, with my nose and brain blocked up. Argh i hate flu. Whatever mann, its like so tired after all that medication. And so cold. Ah-choo!!!

And when i'm not functioning, i end up rambling and rambling. And then i hurt people with my words, or maybe just disturb them. disturb enough for them to feel bad. Next time i dun feel well i should just shut up. Sorry... will make it up to you...

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Not in a good mood, have been trod on one too many times these days. Why should i complain, maybe its just me who feel this way. But i feel neglected, left out, not given a chance, to speak, to prove myself. I just dun feel myself doing enough yet, it's not me. I don't feel accepted in any social circle. People will always want to shun me.

Why do i even complain.

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Today when i reached school, during assembly, GR said that ive something on my hair, and he picked out 2 dead red ants. Whoa. either they died from pricking themselves on my short hair, or my hair is too poisonous, or they were already dead. See what kind of crowd i attract...

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Work left undone, still don't want to do them. not in the mood to. Feel like just rushing them through in lectures/tutorial times.

RJ teachers are so inefficient. This comes from the best school in Singapore, with the best facilities? amazing.

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GW: should i blackmail you? :P

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I feel robbed, again and again. Its not fair, that im always given false hope, and things never turn out right. Sighs.

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Do i really want to take a break?

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There's a wonderful clash in my A's: Maths S and Music (1) starts at the same time on the same day. Maybe i should start training to write essays with my right hand and solve maths with my left. But was talking to GW and J just now, this is what i may end up with:

'Mozart's Quartet in C Major, K(460+5), was composed in year 1700+85, as the last of a set of sq root 36 'Haydn' quartets dedicated to Haydn. This quartet is nicknamed 'Dissonance' after the complex roots that dominate the whole of the first 5^2+1 bars, the Adagio Introduction...'

'motif x^2 + motif x = Sum Y, where Y has a suspension, being a random variable of suspended players during a game. This scalic up and down movement follows the shape of the normal graph, so it is same to assume X ~ N(np, npq) and so we can use the normal distribution table to find out what chord it is at bar 26'

Interesting...

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The stress is really building up on a lot of people. I miss cat high, and all my teachers, who really made sure we could pull through. Its not like i cant turn to any teachers now, but they have their hands full with others. Sighs.

Friends, do i have any that i can really turn to?

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What are the news nowadays? I read them, but then i don't feel like talking about them... But some people don't even read at all... sighs...

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Jackson, not in the best of minds...